12 May, 2007

Trust

You know how sometimes you learn this incredibly life altering lesson, only to look back a year later and repeat the same process? This is where I am living right now, but its such a good feeling. Let me explain...

In January, I applied to about 50 different internship programs. In March, I sent out my resume again to about 30 different places here in Baton Rouge and elsewhere. April came, and there were 6 interviews. No job. Even until this week, there have been some prospects, but nothing definite. That was, until last Tuesday. I got a call from EMI stating that they'd love to have me for an internship.

Up until this point, I was under the assumption that God had forgotten me - even though I know that is NOT part of His character. I would journal and re-read Psalm 40 of "How Long will You forsake me," all the while believing that it was either 1) my fault that I didn't have a job or 2) there was something better. God really renewed my strength in April as I realized that I had absolutely no control over this process and that there was something better waiting for me in time.

So again, the story of my life.... waiting. God's consistent theme in my life seems to be for me to learn how to wait patiently, and I obviously don't have it down yet. If I did, my logic says that I still wouldn't be repeating these lessons. This time around was different. During this waiting season, I learned a whole new aspect of trusting God. It was as if I actually listened to God the last time I was in this interim decision period. In April, my demeanor changed from "why" to "whatever gives you glory." And the beautiful part about it all is that, yet again, God proved himself faithful and beyond compare. On top of that, His answer was more than I ever asked or imagined.

Trust is a beautiful thing. It is leading me to places I never thought were possible. Just excited for what will happen!

1 comment:

ericnally said...

Hey Amy,

I agree...trust can be the most difficult thing to do sometimes. That too has been the theme of the last 2 years for me. I am in the middle of a career change that I feel is the calling God really has for me. However, there are a lotta hurdles to jump over in order to pursue this. Then there's the drastic pay cut I'll take and the question of how I will pay my bills.

Today, my pastor read from Matthew 6 about how the lilies of the field and sparrows are always provided for. It was a reminder to trust. So, as much as my lil brain wants to say "but what about...?", I'm gonna "be still and know that [He is] God" as He commands. God bless and keep on trustin'!